I started this audio book in January because it was a popular self-help title, it was available from the library, and it was January. New Year, New You, BLAH BLAH BLAH. I thought, I’ll listen to it right quick, knock out a quick review, start the year off right.

Nope. That did not happen. It is the last day of an extra long February! I’ve had to check this out from the library three times! NOTHING ABOUT THIS HAS BEEN QUICK! (Also, the past two months have felt like an eternity? Like, 2020 has already been its own decade?)

First, I want to say that I’m behind the premise of this. Self care and taking care of yourself are much bigger projects than a good skincare routine: You have to pay your bills and exercise and feed yourself appropriately and sleep. (How do those two sentences go together? Well, I’m about to tell you.) But, whatever road you take to doing those other big and important things is a good road. Skincare, meditation, and weirdly astrology all helped me sort out* depression and a massive generalized anxiety disorder (Thanks, Grad School!) So, Hollis had me at the title. No matter where I am in the world or how bad my day has been I know that at the very least, I can run through the steps of my skincare routine and at least that will be okay. Like, not to brag, but I don’t wear foundation anymore. Like, maybe I color correct, toss a little concealer on under my eyes. I WANTED SO MUCH TO BE ON THIS BOOK’S SIDE.

I couldn’t do it. Hollis’s voice (not her actual voice, as I was listening to the audio book, but her tone and presentation) is off-putting. I can’t tell you how many times I said out loud, “No, I agree with you. I just don’t like you.” Maybe it was that I kept wanting her to put the stuff she was discussing into a bigger frame and talk about the larger cultural processes that might have you feeling like the world is out to get you and that never happened? I don’t know. This book just wasn’t for me.

Normally, even if things aren’t great, I like to stick it out and finish it. Take one for the team, if you will, so I can review the whole thing. But, it has been two months and I haven’t been reading other things because when I sit down to read (or pick up my phone to listen) I feel like I can’t listen to anything else because I have to finish this. But, I haven’t wanted to finish this, so instead of listening to this, or something else, I’ve gone down some real weird YouTube rabbit holes (and some real political podcast rabbit holes). So, I’m done. Over and out. I took How to Date Men When You Hate Men by Blythe Roberson to the caucus last week (as an ebook. I wasn’t trying to start a fight…about books. I am always happy to start a fight about politics.) and I’m already way more into that that I was into the Hollis.

So, if you want someone to tell you to wash your face, I guess you could try this book I couldn’t finish? Or, you could just hit me up on Insta, Twitter, or in the comments. I’ll very happily talk skincare with you whenever.

*More or less. Sorting out’s an ongoing, play-the-whole-90-minutes-plus-stoppage-time process.